Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Specially for Archie. I've tried to make this as simple as possible, but I think it covers everything? Again, click on it to see it bigger, unless you have some sort of weird insect eyes and are able to read it like this. (edit - actually Blogger doesn't show it at the original size even when you click on it, so apologies if it's still hard to read!)

P.S. I forgot to mention that this flowchart is for entertainment only, and you use it entirely at your own risk. Terms and conditions apply, your list may go down as well as up, etc, etc.

Much Sniping in the Marsh

Predictably, the Great Great Snipe Debate is now underway on BirdForum, Twitter, Facebook etc. And the positions being taken are all very predictable too. So to save a lot of hot air and time that could be better spent birding, here’s a simple flowchart to help you decide your response in cases like this (click to see it full size):

My Theory

My theory, which belongs to me, is as follows.... This is how it goes.... The next thing I am going to say is my theory. Ready?

My theory, by L. Llama (Mr). This theory goes as follows and begins now:

There are a lot of skuas in the North Sea at the moment, and it's going to rain this afternoon, so there might be one at Rutland Water.

That is my theory that is mine and belongs to me and I own it and what it is, too. Unlike the rest of this post, which is entirely stolen from a Monty Python sketch:

UPDATE:

After extensive observations at Rutland Water this afternoon, by myself and others, the number of skuas passing through per hour was conservatively estimated to be zero, thus proving the theory to be, in the immortal words of Douglas Adams, a load of foetid dingo's kidneys. However, some consolation was provided by a juv Pec Sand on Lagoon 3 and later in South Arm 3, and a couple of Curlew Sands and Little Stints on the island.