Tuesday, 21 September 2010

Gull cull?

I see Alan Tilmouth has already picked up on this - http://dustybins.blogspot.com/2010/09/caspian-gulls-new-birdflu.html - but just to add that (as you'd expect really) I'm all in favour of culling Yellow-legged and Caspian Gulls - then I don't have to try and identify the fuckers. Not that I do anyway, but getting rid of them would mean I don't even have to think about it. Or see any more photos of them on Surfbirds.

But seriously, if they did try and cull them (which I'm sure they won't, as it would be totally impractical and never-ending) who would they get to do it? Given that 99% of birders (including me) can't identify most of the large gulls they see these days, how the fuck would DEFRA's half-witted gunslingers manage? Is this just an undercover way of getting rid of all 'dirty seagulls' dreamt up by the Daily Mail? Or a devious attempt by the hired guns to create a new gravy train now that they've finished with the Ruddy Ducks?

As Alan says, no doubt this will get ramped up by the Great British Press into the next bullshit health scare, and we'll have to put up with weeks of lurid headlines and ridiculous articles screaming about how migratory birds are going to kill us all, until everyone forgets about it and the media vultures move on to the next stinking corpse of a story they can find to pick over.

DEADLY VIRUSES AND BACTERIA FOUND IN AIR - PUBLIC ADVISED NOT TO BREATHE!

Or, as the classic Daily Mash headline said: EVERYONE DEAD BY TEATIME!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

See the Independent http://www.independent.co.uk/environment/nature/scavenger-seagulls-carry-superbugs-2084741.html

Skev said...

'Weeks of lurid headlines' - surely you mean weeks of Larid headlines?

Anonymous said...

Ta da! Thank you. Are you available for kids parties and bar mitzvah's?

Skev said...

Sorry - fully booked up for hen weekends.